Wednesday, June 9

I don't wish to go into too much detail discussing the myriad of ways over the course of my very, very long relationship with my boyfriend that I have attempted to make him a more sexual person. I spent the first couple of years anguishing over his low sex drive-- Is it me? Does he not find me attractive? Am I lousy in bed? After deciding that no, it couldn't possibly me me, I proactively tried to get him to try new things with me to find something that would interest him--- everything from new positions to role playing, bdsm stuff, bringing home girlfriends for him to play with, etc. This wasn't something that went on for a couple of months, this was YEARS of trying to be as creative as humanly possible with little result. His libido was still as low as ever. I finally gave up trying.

Anyway, I'm not going to go into the whole history of my relationship and exactly how it ended up being open, but it did, and where things were not fine for a very long time, now they are. If you feel bad for my boyfriend, or want to judge me, that's fine. I can't and don't care. I don't wish to justify my relationship and it's intricacies any more and I won't. How we're dealing with our relationship is not an issue I care to discuss anymore.